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Zaine Arch
2026-05-09 23:44:17 +01:00
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commit 4519cfe804
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(function () {
"use strict";
const KEY = "zxh_hidden_details_v1";
const now = new Date();
const hour = now.getHours();
const path = window.location.pathname;
const state = readState();
const details = [
"The footer keeps a tiny chair for anyone who scrolls this far.",
"Someone labelled the spare cables: important, mysterious, probably for a printer.",
"Memory is just a room that learned how to echo kindly.",
"If you are reading this at night, please unclench your jaw.",
"A bookmark fell asleep here and dreamed it was a door.",
"SYSTEM: kettle confidence restored.",
"Mum says the rice is never late, only thinking.",
"Dad left a note: check the plug, then check your assumptions.",
"The attic server hums like it knows an old song.",
"A small lantern named Morrow was seen under the navigation bar.",
"Home is the place where the mismatched mugs know your hands.",
"This tooltip has been waiting all afternoon to feel useful.",
"404s are just hallways with very sincere lighting.",
"The website looked away politely while you reread that sentence.",
"Winter folded the garden into a quiet letter.",
"Spring arrived wearing yesterday's coat and nobody minded.",
"Autumn keeps receipts from every golden hour.",
"Summer is a glass of water forgotten beside a book.",
"Auntie wrote: do not trust empty biscuit tins. They are emotionally complicated.",
"The comment box occasionally practices being brave.",
"There is soup in the archive, but only metaphorically. Probably.",
"Every old hard drive contains at least one photo called final_final_really.",
"The cursor paused here once. We still talk about it.",
"Friendship is two people saving the better chair without discussing it.",
"Tonight, the page is trying to be a porch light.",
"A tiny bell rings whenever someone chooses kindness and nobody notices.",
"The moon asked the stylesheet for softer margins.",
"You have visited before. The dust remembered your shoes.",
"The search box knows more than it says and less than it implies.",
"A good recipe is a family argument that became edible.",
"Grandad marked this line with a pencil and then forgot why.",
"Do not feed the calendar after midnight; it gets sentimental.",
"The page is handmade. Some fingerprints are load-bearing.",
"Some dreams are just old rooms asking to be opened gently.",
"Loneliness is not proof that you are hard to love.",
"The sidebar once tried poetry. It was mostly indentation.",
"If the site blinks, blink back. It is only being polite.",
"The archive has a cousin called Nettle who files everything under Maybe.",
"Morrow says: the lake is not empty, it is saving room.",
"A spoon knocked twice from inside the recipe page.",
"There are no achievements here. Only small doors and warm lights.",
"The browser tab is pretending to be calm.",
"This sentence was left in a coat pocket from 2009.",
"A family tradition: someone says five minutes and everyone understands twenty.",
"The oldest photo on the shelf still remembers the smell of rain.",
"Some pages do not want to be found quickly.",
"The loading screen packed snacks, just in case.",
"You are allowed to leave a page unfinished.",
"The website is not judging your tabs. It has seen worse.",
"A small blue bowl appears in three memories and no inventories.",
"The old internet was slower, which gave anticipation somewhere to sit.",
"A guestbook entry from nobody says: I was here, kindly.",
"The clock does not chase you here.",
"Nettle borrowed the semicolon and promised to bring it back.",
"Every link is a tiny act of trust.",
"The error page brought a blanket.",
"Sometimes growing older is just learning which lights to leave on.",
"The hallway smells faintly of toast and forgotten passwords.",
"A dream page exists behind a word you have not clicked enough.",
"This site remembers visits, not identities.",
"A note under the doormat reads: take your time.",
"The system log says: heart rebooted successfully.",
"Somebody dusted the pixels before you arrived.",
"Morrow has a lantern. Nettle has a clipboard. Neither has a plan.",
"The kitchen light is on because somebody might come home late.",
"If you found this by accident, that still counts as being invited.",
"The page tried to hum but settled for rendering.",
"A childhood afternoon is stored here at room temperature.",
"The comments are quiet because they are listening.",
"The sitemap has dreams of becoming a treasure map.",
"Do not worry if the day felt unfinished. Most good days do.",
"This button has been clicked before and took it personally.",
"A cupboard in the footer contains emergency biscuits and one tiny apology.",
"Nostalgia is a window with fingerprints on both sides.",
"A cousin once renamed the Wi-Fi to Pretty Please Work.",
"The site keeps a spare sunrise for difficult mornings.",
"You can rest your eyes. The paragraph will wait.",
"A missing page is still a page if it misses you back.",
"The kettle, the clock, and the router have formed a committee.",
"Sometimes the kindest archive is the one that lets things fade.",
"The moon cached this page for offline tenderness.",
"A small paper star is stuck behind the header.",
"The old forum signature reads: be right back, becoming a person.",
"SYSTEM: nostalgia level acceptable. Tea recommended.",
"A dream wrote itself in lowercase and hid under the bed.",
"There is a room in the site where every chair faces the window.",
"A soup recipe was annotated with: add patience until it smells like home.",
"The site has a memory of dial-up and uses it only for dramatic timing.",
"Kindness is often just good timing with shoes on.",
"Some nights the archive counts sheep in binary.",
"The lamp on the study page knows exactly when you are tired.",
"A little paper boat named Afterward is still crossing the margin.",
"The scroll bar has travelled far and asks for no medal.",
"A fake system warning: feelings detected in production.",
"This hidden message has no puzzle value. It is just glad you came.",
"If today was heavy, put it down beside the footer for a minute.",
"Morrow saw your cursor and pretended not to.",
"A family note says: whoever finishes the milk becomes the historian.",
"The website keeps one chair empty for the person you used to be.",
"There is a tiny weather report inside the logo: possible comfort.",
"The secret is not that the site is alive. The secret is that you are.",
"A final scrap says: come back when the page is older."
];
const poems = [
"A room remembers softly / the coat hook, the rain, the key / and you, arriving later.",
"Time put sugar in its tea / and called the afternoon / almost enough.",
"An old friend writes once / and the whole year / grows a window.",
"Dreams leave socks on the floor / and deny everything / by morning.",
"Home is not a place / so much as a light / that forgives your lateness.",
"The garden went quiet / not from sadness / but from listening to roots.",
"A childhood summer / fits in one glass marble / if you hold it up to sun.",
"The clock kept walking / so I gave it a chair / and sat beside it."
];
const greetings = [
"The page saved you a seat.",
"Welcome back to the handmade part of the internet.",
"The kettle just clicked. Good timing.",
"A small light is on in the archive.",
"Today has entered quietly.",
"You are visitor number: emotionally significant.",
"The dashboard shuffled its papers before you arrived.",
"Morrow says hello from somewhere under the floorboards."
];
const nightMessages = [
"It is late here. Drink some water before the next page.",
"Night mode inside night mode: you are allowed to be gentle with yourself.",
"The site lowered its voice because the house is sleeping.",
"A late visitor gets the soft lamp."
];
function readState() {
try {
return JSON.parse(localStorage.getItem(KEY) || "{}");
} catch (_) {
return {};
}
}
function writeState(next) {
try {
localStorage.setItem(KEY, JSON.stringify(next));
} catch (_) {}
}
function pick(list, salt) {
const seed = hash(`${path}|${now.toDateString()}|${salt || ""}`);
return list[seed % list.length];
}
function hash(value) {
let h = 2166136261;
for (let i = 0; i < value.length; i += 1) {
h ^= value.charCodeAt(i);
h = Math.imul(h, 16777619);
}
return Math.abs(h >>> 0);
}
function toast(message, duration) {
let el = document.querySelector(".hidden-toast");
if (!el) {
el = document.createElement("div");
el.className = "hidden-toast";
el.setAttribute("role", "status");
document.body.appendChild(el);
}
el.textContent = message;
el.classList.add("is-visible");
window.clearTimeout(el._timer);
el._timer = window.setTimeout(() => el.classList.remove("is-visible"), duration || 5200);
}
function rememberVisit() {
const visits = (state.visits || 0) + 1;
const seen = Array.isArray(state.seen) ? state.seen : [];
const next = {
...state,
visits,
lastPath: path,
seen: Array.from(new Set([...seen, path])).slice(-80),
firstSeen: state.firstSeen || new Date().toISOString(),
lastSeen: new Date().toISOString()
};
writeState(next);
return next;
}
function addFooterNote(memory) {
const footer = document.querySelector("footer");
if (!footer) return;
const note = document.createElement("p");
note.className = "hidden-footer-note";
const base = pick(details, "footer");
note.textContent = memory.visits > 4 ? `${base} You have passed through ${memory.visits} times.` : base;
footer.appendChild(note);
}
function addHomepageGreeting(memory) {
const target = document.querySelector("#db-greeting");
if (!target) return;
const greeting = pick(greetings, `greeting-${memory.visits}`);
target.textContent = greeting;
const extra = document.createElement("p");
extra.className = "hidden-greeting";
extra.textContent = memory.visits > 1 ? "The site remembers this is not your first doorway." : "First visits count as tiny ceremonies.";
target.closest("div")?.appendChild(extra);
}
function addWhispers() {
const paragraphs = Array.from(document.querySelectorAll("main p, #content p, article p")).filter((p) => p.textContent.trim().length > 80);
paragraphs.slice(0, 4).forEach((p, index) => {
if ((hash(path + index) + index) % 3 !== 0) return;
const mark = document.createElement("span");
mark.className = "hidden-whisper";
mark.tabIndex = 0;
mark.textContent = " ?";
mark.title = pick(index % 2 ? poems : details, `whisper-${index}`);
mark.addEventListener("click", () => toast(mark.title));
p.appendChild(mark);
});
}
function addCornerObject(memory) {
const object = document.createElement("button");
object.className = "hidden-corner-object";
object.type = "button";
object.title = "A very small archive object";
object.textContent = memory.visits % 2 ? "*" : "~";
document.body.appendChild(object);
let clicks = 0;
object.addEventListener("click", () => {
clicks += 1;
const messages = [
"The object is warmer than before.",
"Tap tap. Somewhere, a spoon answers.",
"Morrow whispers: that is not a button, but it appreciates the attention.",
"Nettle files a report titled Repeated Kindness.",
"A loose panel opens in the idea of the page."
];
toast(messages[Math.min(clicks - 1, messages.length - 1)]);
if (clicks === 7) {
window.location.href = "/play/left-behind.html";
}
});
}
function addPatterns(memory) {
const nav = document.querySelector(".site-brand");
if (nav) {
let taps = Number(sessionStorage.getItem("zxh_logo_taps") || 0);
nav.addEventListener("click", (event) => {
if (path === "/" || path === "/index.html") {
event.preventDefault();
taps += 1;
sessionStorage.setItem("zxh_logo_taps", String(taps));
toast(taps >= 5 ? "The logo opens one eye. Try /play/dream-corridor.html" : "The logo makes a tiny ceramic sound.");
if (taps >= 8) window.location.href = "/play/dream-corridor.html";
}
});
}
const search = document.querySelector("#search-input");
if (search) {
search.addEventListener("input", () => {
const value = search.value.trim().toLowerCase();
if (value === "morrow") toast("Search result: lantern, lake, unfinished apology.");
if (value === "nettle") toast("Search result: clipboard, cupboard, suspicious semicolon.");
if (value === "home") toast("Search result: warm window, spare key, somebody humming downstairs.");
if (value === "kitchen light") window.location.href = "/play/kitchen-light.html";
});
}
document.addEventListener("keydown", (event) => {
const key = event.key.toLowerCase();
const chain = `${sessionStorage.getItem("zxh_key_chain") || ""}${key}`.slice(-12);
sessionStorage.setItem("zxh_key_chain", chain);
if (chain.endsWith("remember")) toast("The website remembers gently, which is the only useful kind.");
if (chain.endsWith("dream")) window.location.href = "/play/dream-corridor.html";
});
if (memory.seen?.length >= 6 && !state.travellerNoteShown) {
window.setTimeout(() => {
toast("The map noticed you wandering and left the hallway lights on.");
writeState({ ...readState(), travellerNoteShown: true });
}, 1600);
}
}
function addRareEvents() {
if (hour >= 22 || hour < 5) {
document.body.classList.add("hidden-late-night");
window.setTimeout(() => toast(pick(nightMessages, "night"), 2200), 900);
}
const roll = Math.random();
if (roll < 0.004) {
window.setTimeout(() => showDriftNote("A very rare page breeze passed through.", " .--.\n ( ) <- a cloud pretending to be a thought\n `--'"), 1800);
} else if (roll < 0.012) {
window.setTimeout(() => toast("RARE SYSTEM EVENT: the archive found a biscuit in its coat pocket."), 2400);
}
}
function showDriftNote(text, art) {
const panel = document.createElement("aside");
panel.className = "hidden-drift-note";
panel.innerHTML = `<div>${escapeHtml(text)}</div><pre>${escapeHtml(art)}</pre><button type="button">Close</button>`;
panel.querySelector("button").addEventListener("click", () => panel.remove());
document.body.appendChild(panel);
}
function addSecretLinks() {
[
["/play/left-behind.html", "left behind"],
["/play/dream-corridor.html", "dream corridor"],
["/play/kitchen-light.html", "kitchen light"]
].forEach(([href, label], index) => {
const link = document.createElement("a");
link.className = "hidden-secret-link";
link.href = href;
link.textContent = label;
link.style.left = `${index + 1}px`;
document.body.appendChild(link);
});
}
function enhanceErrors() {
if (document.title.match(/404|not found/i) || document.body.textContent.match(/404|not found/i)) {
toast("This page is missing, but you are not. Try the sitemap, or sit here a second.");
}
}
function escapeHtml(value) {
return String(value).replace(/[&<>"']/g, (char) => ({
"&": "&amp;",
"<": "&lt;",
">": "&gt;",
'"': "&quot;",
"'": "&#039;"
}[char]));
}
document.addEventListener("DOMContentLoaded", () => {
const memory = rememberVisit();
addFooterNote(memory);
addHomepageGreeting(memory);
addWhispers();
addCornerObject(memory);
addPatterns(memory);
addRareEvents();
addSecretLinks();
enhanceErrors();
});
}());